The choice

the-choice

The glimpse of yesterday and the choice of the now.

I took a walk down memory lane,

And ended up sleeping In the meadows of my childhood,

The ennui of a broken home was welcoming,

The company of narrow minds,

The presence of indifferent smiles,

It felt sour.

I got up as one should.

Then, I took a hike.

Through the madness of hormones and teenage angst.

The road was filled with too much detour and too little focus,

It was misguided by a reckless spirit,

Inspired by devoid sentiment,

Which resulted in the making of a cynic.

And here I am,

I suppose I have arrived At my supposed destination.

This is the next part.But what is the point?

I have been 23 since I was 9,

I have been a parent for my inner child.

Now I know better,

Now I know enough,

I chose to choose me.

It feels like living in the cathartic yesterday and the chaotic now.

It should feel splendid,

It's beyond fearless.

But it feels bloody,

It feels metallic,

It burns like acid.

Choosing me felt like drowning myself in cold ice.

It felt like swallowing sharp glass.

It's lonely and empty.

It taught me lemerence,

And my own impermanence.

Is this the cost of stepping up?

I chose me.Aren't I brave?

So what is a girl to do,

To begin again and forget all that's true?What is a girl to do,

To remain kind,

To be gentle and fulfill her life?

For now this is where I am meant to be.

It ends in question and uncertainty.

Yet the road proceeds,

And so will we.

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